Lord, I'm here to submit myself unto You.
Sometimes, I'll doubt Your love.
Sometimes, I'll ask why do You put me in such situation?
Sometimes, my faith to you wasn't that strong.
Lord, please let me know that no matter what happend, You are always there, to comfort me and to listen to me.
Lord, I believe that You could listen to the thoughts in my heart.
And I believe that You know what is the future of mine.
You ask me to wait for the perfect time and You will answer my prayer.
You ask me to wait patiently.
Your wisdom is much far away from human being themselves.
Please let me don't doubt on Your wisdom, Your kindness, Your love and Your mercy.
Because Your grace is sufficient for Your children.
Lord, your child is here, waiting for You, Lord.
Lord, let me listen to Your voice.
Let me know what I should do.
Let me know Your will.
Let me go through every difficult time, for You will go through with me and I'm not alone to go through it.
Lord, I know your love to me.
And so, please let me love you whole heartedly.
I submit my life unto You.
Please guide me.
Friday, November 26, 2010
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Initmate Friend
I was very depress for the past 2 days.
I asked myself: Do I have an intimate friend?
I have friends, good friends. What about initimate one?
The one that I will go to when I really in depression.
The one that I cry infront of her/him without saying any words.
The one that understand my feeling without asking me any questions.
And I have got my answer: No.
Perhaps, I could only seek God when I am in this situation.
Talk to Him alone, cry to Him alone.
I asked myself: Do I have an intimate friend?
I have friends, good friends. What about initimate one?
The one that I will go to when I really in depression.
The one that I cry infront of her/him without saying any words.
The one that understand my feeling without asking me any questions.
And I have got my answer: No.
Perhaps, I could only seek God when I am in this situation.
Talk to Him alone, cry to Him alone.
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Unconcious
How good if I could go to beach alone.
A beach which is very far away from home and nobody knows me.
It could be better if I could lye on the beach with a glass of wine, sipping till I'm drunk.
To make my mind free.
I have no aim, no target, no motive, nothing.
I don't feel to work.
I don't feel to laugh.
I don't feel to talk, either.
I don't feel to go to a place which is full of people, I wish I could be alone.
Should I take a break? But I have just came back from vacation.
What's happening on me? I'm crazy, I think.
Coffee no longer makes me awake.
A depress person will be drunken by coffee, you think so? Yes.
Feel like crying.
Father Lord, what should I do?
I wish I could quit everything.
I wish I could give up everything.
I wish I could whole heartedly in serving you.
I guess this is the only source of joy.
I feel light when I seek you.
I feel light when I'm in church, singing and praising.
A beach which is very far away from home and nobody knows me.
It could be better if I could lye on the beach with a glass of wine, sipping till I'm drunk.
To make my mind free.
I have no aim, no target, no motive, nothing.
I don't feel to work.
I don't feel to laugh.
I don't feel to talk, either.
I don't feel to go to a place which is full of people, I wish I could be alone.
Should I take a break? But I have just came back from vacation.
What's happening on me? I'm crazy, I think.
Coffee no longer makes me awake.
A depress person will be drunken by coffee, you think so? Yes.
Feel like crying.
Father Lord, what should I do?
I wish I could quit everything.
I wish I could give up everything.
I wish I could whole heartedly in serving you.
I guess this is the only source of joy.
I feel light when I seek you.
I feel light when I'm in church, singing and praising.
Rejoice
Could you believe? When I am so depress and pray to my Heavenly Father for joy, and I see this Bible verses:
"Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
"Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Depress
How to buy happiness? An object is not able to buy a non object things. How subjective is happiness? Who is real happy in this world? Happy may have limited time; joy in the heart is everlasting. Please fill my heart with joy, my heavenly Father.
Different
What should one do if they felt that the one they want is no longer the one they want? To leave? To remain? To compromise? dilemma...
Saturday, November 13, 2010
House Moving
It's mid of the night and I am still very concious. Am I born to night sleeper? I fell asleep in the office this afternoon but I'm so energentic now.
6 hours later we will start our house moving. I believe that my parents and my brother is still awake on their bed. We have been staying in this rented house for around 2 years and 1 month. Is there any memory in this house? Yes, there is. But the memory is different from my previous home. This house is full of the memory of my niece whereas the previous one is my teenage life momories.
A lot of cartons at my house now, yet there are still a lot of things haven't been pack. Nobody will believe that we owned so many things, and most of them are nonsense. I told my mom that hopefully this is the last time for house moving.
I'm counting down the time to 7am so that I can help around. I am gifted to be healthy and energetic although my physical looks weak. I am so worry for my mom, who had dealing with all those renovation contractor for the pass 2 months. I thank her a lot. Of course, there were some argument during this period of time for different opinion and thoughts. But I really salute her. A 54 years old lady, dealing for the renovation, from A to Z alone. I love you, mom.
I pray to God, to give this house love, for He is the God of love. I pray for Him to be the head of our house. I thank Him for blessing us with this lovely home. Father Load, I thank You and I love You!
6 hours later we will start our house moving. I believe that my parents and my brother is still awake on their bed. We have been staying in this rented house for around 2 years and 1 month. Is there any memory in this house? Yes, there is. But the memory is different from my previous home. This house is full of the memory of my niece whereas the previous one is my teenage life momories.
A lot of cartons at my house now, yet there are still a lot of things haven't been pack. Nobody will believe that we owned so many things, and most of them are nonsense. I told my mom that hopefully this is the last time for house moving.
I'm counting down the time to 7am so that I can help around. I am gifted to be healthy and energetic although my physical looks weak. I am so worry for my mom, who had dealing with all those renovation contractor for the pass 2 months. I thank her a lot. Of course, there were some argument during this period of time for different opinion and thoughts. But I really salute her. A 54 years old lady, dealing for the renovation, from A to Z alone. I love you, mom.
I pray to God, to give this house love, for He is the God of love. I pray for Him to be the head of our house. I thank Him for blessing us with this lovely home. Father Load, I thank You and I love You!
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